I am at the season in my life where everyone is getting married and having babies (if they haven’t already). And it’s not that I don’t want that life, it’s just not quite time yet (or so it seems).
But family never seems to stop cracking me up.
Grandmother (via phone after I graduated from college): so when are you having babies?
Me(early 20’s, broke, single, looking for a stable job in the “city”): Um, after I get married?
GM: you know, your mother was married and had you at your age……
Me: I know but not yet, granny
GM: Okay..but don’t wait too long!
(all the while I’m thinking: what the hell happened to “ get married first and then have babies?” Is THIS person the same grandmother I knew all my life? Where is she? Because surely this woman who evaded her body just want great-grand babies).
And it doesn’t end there. I have other family members asking when they will get a piece of cake (wedding cake) or when is the big day…
Drives me crazy!
You would know when I know and since I have no idea when any of this is happening, please stop asking!
And what makes it worst is my love of food.
Yes, my love of food.
I can eat. I am picky but I love to chow down. I currently have the title of being the “hungriest girl in the world” by my love. He can go days on end not eating and I cannot go for more than a few hours.
Match made in heaven!
Once, when we were visiting my family, he made a reference to my nickname since I mentioned that I was hungry.
Guess what my family asked?
Are you pregnant?!
(Um…no…I’m just freaking hungry all the time; always been…you should know that being that you raised me and I lived with you for, you know, most of my life…just saying…)
And let’s not start with the babies.
I do love children; they are awesome. Grant it, there was a time I could not stand being around them to the point that I did not want any, but I was babysitting both by choice and mostly by default. I was sick of being pushed to be with the kiddies. Who wouldn’t when you are a teenager?
But now, I do coo at a cutie and always congratulating a mother who is expecting (undercover doula in training) because they deserve the love and positive vibes in a cruel, cruel, funky world.
But that does not mean that I have baby fever or that my ovaries jump for joy holding a baby. Too many times I am accused of that while I am thinking quite the opposite
”Lord, please don’t let these people think I got baby fever. All I am doing is enjoying watching this little one for now because I would freak out and still probably know what to do if I had a child right now. I am not ready…yet!”
If I were to be pregnant right now, I swear everyone would be excited and happy…
I’ll be freaking out, crying don’t know what to do. Cursing everyone including myself.
It wouldn’t be pretty…
And I probably would still know what to do